Key to Accountability It took me thirty years to get a sponsor—really. That’s how hardheaded and faithless I am. But when I finally did surrender to having a sponsor, it made all the difference. I finally was accountable; but more than that, I had a guide, a friend, and a sounding board. My recovery grew exponentially, so much so that I even took … Read More
She Was Right My sponsor told me God loved me just the way I was but also loved me too much to let me stay that way. I was full of self-doubt and fear yet wished to control myself and the world around me. I was dishonest—I lied, stole, embellished, gossiped, and I disparaged others to make myself feel better. I was 50 … Read More
Walking Through One of the better moves I made in early recovery was finding a sponsor. I was fortunate. After much trepidation, I found a sponsor who lived and practiced the Steps and made that the focus of our relationship. At that time, the program had food sponsors, Step sponsors, and spiritual sponsors, and over the years, I got help from people … Read More
A Good Sponsor Wannabe My sponsorship style is patterned after the way I was sponsored: I try to be gracious, kind, and compassionate. I also attempt, as my sponsor does, to match my style of sponsoring to the needs of the sponsee—not always an easy task—and I have found this approach often needs tweaking as my sponsee and I go along. The specifics of … Read More
What If At a recent OA business meeting, our discussion revolved around member retention: how can we keep newcomers and other members coming back? After the meeting, a person near me said, “What if . . . what if everyone here took on one more sponsee?” What if? What if? This churned in my mind for over a week as I thought … Read More
I’ve Decided to Sponsor I have been attending OA for about nine or ten months. Coming into my first meeting, I did have some idea of what to expect; a friend had told me. I have a tendency to connect deeply with the emotions of people in a room; sometimes that’s a blessing, sometimes it’s a struggle. In that first meeting, I immediately felt … Read More
Life Gets Easier I was talking to my sponsee the other day. Just writing that sentence is a revelation—me, a sponsor? That’s something I thought would never happen, and something I would never be good enough for. When I was asked to be a sponsor, I was so stunned that the first thing that flew out of my mouth was, “Are you sure?” … Read More
The Only Thing That Worked Hi, I’m Chris B., a compulsive overeater and powerless over food. I would not be alive today if I didn’t sponsor. I say this because it’s my truth, and I cannot keep what I’ve received unless I give it away. I used to weigh over 430 pounds (195 kg). I used to question whether I could sponsor someone or not. … Read More
Speed Dating for Sponsors At our annual retreat, a miscommunication turned into a fantastic new workshop. When the leader of a session on sponsorship referred to “speed dating,” several members of the organizing committee thought we were going to experience speed dating for sponsors! It seemed a natural progression: we could move from a session on the benefits of sponsorship to a practical activity. The … Read More
Perfect Meetings, Perfect Sponsors Our program works without us working it perfectly. I’m celebrating thirty years of abstinence, and I don’t even know how “working it perfectly” looks. Taking awkward baby steps, clumsily using the Tools, and making a haphazard job of the Steps and Traditions is enough for me. Expecting perfection from ourselves and others can cost us our recovery. I’ll be blunt: … Read More