Different Bodies, Similar Reasoning

Look for the similarities, not the differences.” How grateful I am to have gotten that message straightaway when I walked in the doors of OA. It was out of desperation that I had to do this, because the only alternative was going to be death.

I came to OA looking different than most, weighing in at 42–47 kilograms (93–99 lbs), my hair slicked back so tight, my skin so pale, my eyes sunken in, bones protruding through my clothes . . . I was literally just a shadow (if I could even cast one) of the person I am today. I was lifeless, dead, and empty! But I was so desperate to be pulled out of the hell I was in, and I had nowhere else to go.

In meetings, I sat with my head down and eyes closed so I could hear the message of hope rather than see the differences in others. Even though we acted out differently with food (and looked different as a result), I could hear the similarities in our relationships with food. I heard what food had done for them, and I knew we felt the same. We acted out for the same reasons: we were powerless over food.

That was enough for me to know I had come to the right place to get the recovery I needed to deal with life on life’s terms without using food as a coping mechanism. I’m so glad that, even back then, I decided to “look for the similarities, not the differences!”

— Kim K., Brisbane, Queensland, Australia