Insulin-Free

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It’s a red-letter day, a miracle. I’m fearful (in case this is only temporary) but elated. I’m finally off insulin. About sixteen months ago, I began taking insulin every day to control my diabetes, but now I’ve gotten to zero units per day. I cannot begin to explain how wonderful it feels. I’ve lost 82 pounds (37 kg) and have changed so much in my life.

I changed how I relate to the world around me. I devoted untold hours to reading about recovery while I walked on a treadmill at the gym. I cried more tears than I knew I had in me. And I healed parts of my past I didn’t know bothered me until I stopped using food to mask my pain. I can handle whatever emotion comes up now without my binge foods. I can sit with my pain or joy and write about it, or call someone, or simply discuss it with my Higher Power. That’s one more major change—I’ve developed a relationship with a Higher Power, and I feel the force of goodness and love. It took me until I was 46, but I’m glad I found a spiritual home.

Physical, mental, and spiritual healing have happened in my life, and I am so grateful. I don’t have to hate myself for not eating perfectly and not living a perfect life. OA is about progress, not perfection. I don’t get it right every day, but the important difference is how I deal with whatever is going on.

Type 2 diabetes is directly affected by food intake—something I told myself for a year before I even tried to control the progression of my compulsion. But I had to work up to changing my life. Now, if I just keep doing what I need to do, one day at a time, I will continue to recover and never have to get back on insulin.

Overeaters Anonymous has literally saved me. The Twelve Steps are wonderful. The Tools of Recovery are miracles in themselves. I am so grateful for the people around these tables every week, grateful for all I’ve learned. I know my journey has only just begun: each day is another chance to live in recovery. Today I can do anything I set my heart and mind to do with the help of my Higher Power and the Steps and Tools of OA. Thank you for this highest good of all.

— Edited and reprinted from The Stepping Stone, Northeast Wisconsin Intergroup, Oct/Nov 2013

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