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Whatever and However

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As a sickly kid, I learned to be dependent on my mother. She made all the decisions for me, and I learned that I was incapable of picking myself up when I fell. She was judgemental and emotionally abusive—a rageaholic and compulsive overeater. At age five, my clothes fit tightly because I was fat. I ate to bury the pain, eventually gaining and losing over 300 pounds (136 kg) before I started recovery. Today, I’m on dialysis with end-stage kidney disease, so adherence to my food plan and access to nearby medical facilities are vital. One evening last December, I

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