Craving Sanity

Over twenty-two years ago, after six years of being in OA, I finally accepted that there were certain foods I could not begin to eat without developing uncontrollable cravings. My six years of recovery/relapse cycles and my thirty-five years of yo-yo dieting were suddenly explained. It was clear: In order for me to be abstinent, I had to eliminate those foods that caused me to have uncontrollable cravings. Then I had to work the Steps to make sure that my mind would not persuade me that I could try just one bite.

I looked at the common ingredients of my binge foods and realized they were all combinations of high fat content with either sugar or salt. So I developed an eating plan that eliminated foods high in fat content. I checked labels care fully to make sure there were no hidden fats. I worked the Steps and recovered. The miracle happened, and I no longer wanted to eat any of those foods. I was free from wanting to return to them, and could watch others eat them without feeling any temptation.

I still had not lost a lot of weight, and I knew that to carry the message of recovery through the Twelve Steps I had to be a model to those who still suffered. Clearly I was eating too much, even though what I was eating was healthy. I read on pages two and three of The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous that I should be looking at my compulsive food behaviors as well. I isolated two of them that seemed to create cravings for a higher volume of food.

One of them was the need to keep my mouth busy all the time; I was always chewing something. So I eliminated that eating behavior and ate only three meals a day, not chewing or sucking anything between those meals.

The other eating behavior was the need to be completely full. So I found ways to limit the amount of healthy food I was eating at my three meals. At times it meant measuring or weighing, at other times estimating, at other times feeling a sense of fullness around the bottom of my stomach rather than at the top of it. I immediately began to lose weight.

Over the years I identified more foods that caused cravings, and gave them up as soon as I identified them. When my doctor wanted me to lose a bit more, I cracked down on some sloppy food behaviors, like reading or watching TV while eating, until I lost the weight. Since my recovery, giving up foods and eating behaviors which cause me uncontrollable cravings has been easy.

The Twelve Steps have given me the sanity promised in Step Two. That sanity allows me to say, “Yes, other people can eat these things or indulge in these eating behaviors, but I can’t. They’re poison to me. And I don’t miss them!”

— Anonymous