The Choices We Make I have experienced the 100-pounder (45-kg) status twice: first as a newcomer, and three years later after a six-month relapse. Recovering, I reached a 30- to 40-pound (14- to 18-kg) loss and then plateaued. I felt like nothing was working. Desperate people are willing to take desperate measures. I finally admitted I needed help from a food sponsor, who was willing … Read More
Greater Than Myself I began the most recent chapter of my OA journey by facing the futility of a sixteen-year relapse. I admired nothing about myself, least of all my body. I had weight-loss surgery in 2001, yet I’d managed to gain back all the weight I’d lost plus 25 extra pounds (11 kg). I weighed over 300 pounds (136 kg). I had … Read More
New Beginning When I came back to OA in 2005, I was in yet another relapse, with much weight gain, physical misery, and emotional and spiritual hopelessness. Though I sat at meetings, I kept bingeing and feeling like I just couldn’t recover anymore. My thoughts kept telling me that this was too hard, that I didn’t deserve recovery, and that I was … Read More