Healthy Program Boundaries The Tenth Tradition, like so many other Traditions, keeps OA meetings focused on the OA message of recovery through the Steps, Traditions, and Tools. It sets a healthy boundary as to what is appropriate to say in a program setting and discourages digression into outside issues. I’ve learned about setting healthy program boundaries by seeing the Traditions in action at meetings. I try to keep the … Read More
Start with Forgiveness When we approach Step Nine, how often have we heard the suggestion to put ourselves at the top of the list? When we first hear this, it is usually very difficult. We have forever been putting ourselves at the bottom of the list and now folks are saying to put ourselves at the top? Scary! But so important! How can … Read More
The Underwear Amends Many times in the OA rooms, I’d heard people talk about putting themselves at the top of the list when beginning their Ninth Step amends. People said they’d punished, neglected, or mistreated themselves at least as much as they did anyone else, so self-amends were in order. I listened, but I just didn’t get it. Oh, I could run a … Read More
A Possible and Promising Step I dreaded the Ninth Step more than any of the others, even the Fourth and Fifth Steps. I’ve always envied those who seem to lead fairly normal lives, doing no more than a minimal amount of damage as they went along. I’m not one of those. My selfishness and self-centeredness knew no limits. Everywhere I went, everything I participated in, … Read More
Stepping into a Vocation After thirty years in OA, I’m still deeply grateful that I’ve been able to keep off more than 150 pounds (68 kg). A critical part of my success has been working the Twelve Steps of OA. When I first joined OA, I was able to quickly work Steps One through Seven. Then came the feared Steps Eight and Nine. Because I … Read More
Ready or Not Last year, I reached Step Nine and had seven amends to make. I made five of them months ago. The two that are left are my parents, and to be honest, the only reason I haven’t made amends with my dad is because I consider them a package deal. So the amends I’m stalling on is to my mother. “I’m … Read More
Show Up Anyway “I have learned that it does not matter how afraid I am. I can show up anyway. I pray and ask God to help me, and I’ve never been disappointed” (Voices of Recovery, p. 337). I was 55, divorced for six years, and very lonely. One morning as I was walking to work, I prayed to my Higher Power, saying, … Read More
Recovery through Divorce My ex-husband and I divorced about five and a half years into my recovery. It was a painful process, but the Tools and Traditions of the OA program sustained me in a variety of ways: Service. Initially, I served as convention treasurer to give me a focus on something other than the divorce. Sponsorship and telephone. I relied more on … Read More
Spiritual Nourishment Before I came to OA, I thought I was the most confident 33-year-old out there. I had a great full-time job, a boyfriend, dog, my own apartment, and a car. Yet, I could not stop eating those binge foods. Then, I lost my ability to diet and kept gaining weight. I was a size 26 and had tried everything from diet programs to … Read More
Recovery in the Air “So we clean house with the family, asking each morning in meditation that our Creator show us the way of patience, tolerance, kindliness and love” (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., p. 83). I walked my daughter down the aisle on Saturday. I was a proud mama! Proud of her for the woman she is and proud of myself for the mom I’ve … Read More
