Steps Step 10: Dirty Laundry I was in the launderette flicking through one of their magazines when I saw something I quite liked. “This is just a secondhand magazine,” I thought. “It won’t matter if I rip this page out and take it home.” I tore out the page discreetly, hoping no one would see. (The first sign of dishonest activity: secrecy!) That evening as … Read More
Steps Self-Subtraction In a meeting many years ago, people with strong long-term recovery shared on the topic of placing Principles before personalities. They said they had learned, over the years, to focus on what was shared rather than who was sharing it. This reminds me of a slogan my spiritual teacher shared with me: “Peace equals this moment minus my opinion of … Read More
Traditions Tradition 9: Alive and Well Our group has no government, no permanent officeholders, no small committee that runs everything, and no authorities. Instead, we encourage rotation of service for all offices. Our longest-term members are not even informal leaders. Instead, they are only members among members. (Sometimes longtimers’ perspectives make them more sensitive to Tradition breaks than newer members, but we are all encouraged to … Read More
Steps Step 9: Honest Effort In one of my meetings this week, we were asked to respond to a question from the Twelve Step Workbook of Overeaters Anonymous regarding Step Nine. I chose “What is the purpose of Step Nine?” (p. 65). I completed my first Step Nine amends the first year I joined OA, but I never fully answered all the questions in the … Read More
Steps Step 8: Admission and Prayer Step Eight asks me to own up to who I am in relation to other people and myself. Working with a sponsor helped. I returned to OA after a relapse, during which I quickly gained 40 pounds (18 kg). After a suicidal crisis, I realized I would slowly eat myself to death if I continued. I received the gift of … Read More
Service Try Writing At sharing time in OA meetings, I sometimes read thoughts I have written down. Sharing thoughts and speaking out loud what I have written helps my recovery. Other members used to say, “You should submit that to Lifeline.” But I thought, “If what I write is rejected, I’ll feel rejected” or “What if it isn’t good enough?” My fear of … Read More
Steps Step 7: Right Actions I’ve been reading and studying Steps Six and Seven in the past weeks. I’ve become particularly watchful and aware of my major character defects, and I truly believe I should take these Steps daily in order to keep working toward what Higher Power wants for me. Recently, I was in the company of a colleague whom I admire and like; … Read More
Traditions Tradition 7: Strive to Give I schlepped into my first OA meeting late and in dirty clothes, fearful of the people around me. I left early too. But I kept coming back, and eventually I found sanity, a benevolent higher power, and abstinence. I’ve recently become interested in exploring the Traditions at a deeper level. This is what Tradition Seven means to me. I strive to … Read More
Steps Step 6: Wishy-Washy I recently had to change out my dishwasher. That doesn’t seem like a big thing, but I put it off as long as I could. I used duct tape for months to keep the front panel on. Even after I needed extra rinses to get the dishes clean, I still took a couple of weeks to order a new dishwasher. … Read More
Steps Step 5: Seeing My Part When I arrived in OA, I was full of anger, resentment, blame, guilt, and a lot of other negative emotions. When someone did a “wrong” to me, it was his or her fault and never mine. Everything that happened to me was not my fault. Life wasn’t good to me; I was always the innocent person being hurt. When I … Read More
