Coming back from work one late winter afternoon, I caught myself thinking that since the weather was cold, I’d better get home, take a hot shower, put on those nice pajamas, have a soup, and finally snuggle into a soft warm blanket to watch a movie or read a novel or newspaper. However, it was Wednesday, the day of my …

“Chronic complaining is a useless practice that destroys self-acceptance and self-reliance . . . Instead . . . I can ask myself, “Is there anything I can do to help myself with this?” (For Today, p. 239). Chronic complaining sounds like self-abuse: if I continue to stay in the problem, then I am living in the problem—and living in the …

It works if you work it. I’m writing because I’ve been listening and talking to OA members who have been around program for less time than me but have expressed disillusionment; I’ve heard concerns and criticisms about OA, the recovery of our members, and the effectiveness of the program. Comments have gone something like this: I don’t know if OA …

As a child, I loved this fairy tale: A girl is born, and a fairy gives her the “gift” of obedience. At first, she tries to protect herself by keeping her gift/curse a secret, but when her father remarries, her bossy, jealous stepmother and stepsisters quickly discover she has no choice but to obey. Her life becomes unmanageable. Stripped of …

While doing some writing about the “vital spiritual experience” described in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th. ed., p. 27), I had a brand-new thought. I identified with the person being described: someone wanting very much to be free of the addiction that was making his life impossible, puzzled and despairing over why he couldn’t stop. For myself, I’d given …

Two doctors gave me tough love at crucial times in my recovery, for which I am now grateful, though I wasn’t at the time. Shortly after I joined OA in 1990, my new friends suggested I see my general practitioner about my recurring stomach upsets. This doctor told me bluntly that the upsets were due to my anorexia, specifically from …

First, I had to get past the mourning stage. I arrived at OA grieving the loss of my best friend, lover, and confidante—my go-to for any emotional relationship. Compulsive overeating had replaced many important relationships in my life, leaving me in a turbulent, one-sided, love-hate situation. OA was gentle in guiding me to a healthier state of mind, putting food …

I have not always had a weight problem, but I’ve always had the disease of compulsive overeating. Before age 13, the disease did not show up on my body, because I was using the fuel to grow. But it was definitely at work between my ears, manifesting mentally through my obsession with sweets and other binge foods and spiritually through …

Last year I was 14 and a half stone (92 kg; 203 lbs) and ate incessantly when I wasn’t at work. I ate anything in sight. My knees complained as I struggled up the stairs at the end of my shifts. My heart was unhappy about coping with my extra weight. Despite knowing what I should do and promising every …

My oldest daughter in her early teens caused me a great many problems—this was in the mid-1990s. Coincidentally at that time, Lifeline featured a series of articles on various Traditions. During one of my weekly phone calls with my sponsor, I mentioned those Lifeline articles. She suggested I go through the Traditions and see how many of them applied to …