Steps Traditions Accessible to All When I showed up at my first OA meeting, I did not have the desire to stop eating compulsively. I was morbidly obese and had lost and gained large amounts of weight throughout my life. My desires back then were different. I wanted to be thin. I wanted the emotional pain to stop. I wanted a reason to continue living. … Read More
Abstinence Relapse Only Abstinence Food was my best friend for a long time. I had a troubled childhood, and excess food numbed the difficult emotions and gave me comfort. I managed to comfort myself up to 292 pounds (133 kg) by the time I was 26 years old, and I stayed close to that weight for five years. I tried every diet out there, … Read More
Steps Traditions Light Reaching Out Why would you care about a visibly overweight stranger? A person who needs a chair to sit on during long strolls through a department store? A person whose breathing you can hear as you travel close by them in an elevator? Do you understand a person who never seems to gain weight yet always eats or a person who shows … Read More
Recovery Relationships Connecting to Hope and Help I’ve always been a loner, happy in my own company, where I write, create, talk to myself, and can completely be myself with no mask, no pretenses, and no judgement. I had been a misfit throughout my life, always extremely self-conscious around other people. In the company of others, I would feel an element of forced politeness and false cheerfulness; afterwards, … Read More
Steps Traditions When Desire Works Tradition Three works. I believe the best way to show it is to share what I was shown when I first arrived in OA. All I wanted to do was lose weight while eating all my binge foods—was that too much to ask? I hated that I was unable to eat like my friends: they were skinny, yet here I … Read More
How OA Changed My Life Recovery Acknowledging the Backstory Back in the twentieth century, it still felt okay to ridicule fat people. They seemed so cartoonish. Who could resist poking fun at them behind their backs? Today, I know that gossip is despicable. The obese are the last objects of scorn and prejudice, aren’t they? What did we ignorant people know of their inner lives? In a memoir I … Read More
Diversity Newcomers What OA Is Not I realize after six months in OA that when I ate in the past, I was searching for the good feelings I had as a child. I remember happy family gatherings centered on food: family reunion picnics, camping trip cookouts, holidays, and celebrations. The fun and happiness had disappeared from my life. Why? I ate the same foods as I had … Read More
Gratitude Recovery Sweet and Simple I’ve struggled with my weight since I was 5 years old. At that time I heard my father comment, “No fat daughter of mine will ever be seen in a tutu!” Those words would haunt me for fifty years. At the time I heard them, I didn’t know I was fat; I was only in kindergarten. I had not yet … Read More
Gratitude Recovery I Did Everything Possible My first day of program was November 3, 1983. How could I ever forget it? That day not only changed my life, it saved my life. At my first meeting, after the welcoming remarks and introductions, the OA Preamble, and the Steps, Traditions, and Tools, they read the passage “Welcome to Overeaters Anonymous. Welcome home!” I started to cry—softly, of course. … Read More
Abstinence No Guarantee but Grace I awakened abstinent today, clearheaded and present. Wow. Another day, G-d! It’s a far cry from the hangover of a binge. I call my caring sponsor each morning at 7 a.m. to commit to myself, to her, and to the G-d of my understanding my three planned, delicious, abundant meals. When I write down and prepare my meals, it sets the tone … Read More