Recalculating the Route I believe that God’s “will” for us is only a direction, not one path for us. Because I have free will, I can choose a direction based on my character defects, yet still have things work out. That’s because I believe God works like the GPS in a car: if we’re driving in the wrong direction, the GPS recalculates and … Read More
HP on a Personal Level For twenty-three years, I had been active in OA but never could get lasting abstinence. So, I started focusing on the spiritual side of the Steps, immersing myself in gaining a closer relationship with my God and Higher Power. I didn’t want to just believe in a Higher Power; I wanted to know my HP on a personal level. The … Read More
Honest to God Surrender is such a simple yet profound concept. When thought about, it seems so impossible and distant, yet when practiced, it is right at my fingertips. I find this dichotomy strange. In my religion, the recognition that we need God’s help to accomplish anything in life is meant to be second nature. However, in my life, this has been an … Read More
“Harmonic” Power When I attended my first OA beginner’s meeting three-and-a-half years ago, I brought a concept of God that I’d cobbled together from childhood. And, coming from a family of atheists, I’d felt an unspoken need to keep my spiritual beliefs a secret. Standing in a circle, holding hands, and saying the Serenity Prayer at that first meeting was terrifying. It … Read More
A Mistaken Belief After almost ten years in OA and a physical abstinence of my own definition, I struggled with the fact that I was still stuck in obsession and compulsion around food. I had a way of eating that was more or less nutritionally balanced, but I still obsessed about knowing exactly what I was going to eat. I was alternating between … Read More
Forgetting or Accepting Sometimes, I have resentment about being in this program. I say the Serenity Prayer daily, follow a food plan, and try to give myself ten minutes each day to pray or meditate. I go to a strength and flexibility class three times a week and walk three to five times weekly. I read the literature, listen to podcasts, go to … Read More
Crossing That Bridge I certainly was selfish. I wasn’t present to do things with my friends and family, preferring instead to isolate with my best “frenemy”: food. I spent my whole life refusing to accept I was powerless to control my compulsion to overeat, and I’d eat anything I could get my hands on—a lot. I was able to lose lots of weight, … Read More
Twelve Pointers My understanding is that a spiritual awakening is a radical internal rearrangement of attitudes, priorities, desires, and beliefs. The effect is I’ve now become able to do, think, feel, and say things that I could not before— no matter how hard I tried, how sincerely I wanted to, or how dire any consequences. I came into OA in my early … Read More
Energy, Plain and Simple I first set foot in an OA meeting eleven years ago, but until lately, I had been unable to attain long-term recovery. Why? I couldn’t find a Power greater than myself. Lack of a Higher Power kept me sick much longer than necessary. I made desperate attempts, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to believe anything outside myself … Read More
Sacred Store When I became an adult, I realized my father had suffered from a disease similar to my disease of compulsive overeating. His was “compulsive hoarding disorder.” Over the years, I’ve developed a much more compassionate view of his bizarre behavior, and I credit my participation in OA for this realization . . . and for my ability to forgive him. My … Read More