“Harmonic” Power When I attended my first OA beginner’s meeting three-and-a-half years ago, I brought a concept of God that I’d cobbled together from childhood. And, coming from a family of atheists, I’d felt an unspoken need to keep my spiritual beliefs a secret. Standing in a circle, holding hands, and saying the Serenity Prayer at that first meeting was terrifying. It … Read More
Instant Gratification It was Saturday night, and I was on my own. I was driving home to have my dinner, but I was accompanied by plenty of thoughts about food and finding a way to have just a little something sweet. After I got home and ate, I brushed my teeth and left my house to meet some friends at a social … Read More
Dear One: I “DO” OA has been a blessing in my life since July 2016. Working through the Steps has given me a new perspective and a more intimate relationship with this Power greater than ourselves than I have ever had before. I have called my Higher Power many names throughout my life (though “HP” is not one of them). I’d been ranting and … Read More
Grounded by Grace After I shared my Fourth Step inventory with my sponsor, taking the Fifth Step, I moved on and wrote this poem during the hour I spent with God alone as I took Steps Six and Seven. Broad highway Narrow path, narrow steps. Tight rope strung between mountain peaks formed by stories, wrapped in drama, about a life lived overdone. Suspended, … Read More
A Mistaken Belief After almost ten years in OA and a physical abstinence of my own definition, I struggled with the fact that I was still stuck in obsession and compulsion around food. I had a way of eating that was more or less nutritionally balanced, but I still obsessed about knowing exactly what I was going to eat. I was alternating between … Read More
No More Hiding I have a vivid recollection of a moment early in recovery: I’d just arrived at an OA meeting, a regular meeting I considered “home.” On the way to this meeting, I’d binged. Before exiting my car, I was fearfully and intently stuffing my wrappers and trash into the armrest storage space. And though I was alone in my car, I … Read More
Let God The AA Big Book outlines “the spiritual answer and program of action” (4th ed., p. 42), which hundreds had followed with success at the time it was written. Now millions of people follow the Twelve Step path with miraculous stories of recovery. Ours is a spiritual program. What exactly does that mean? I grew up in an organized religion. As … Read More
Forgetting or Accepting Sometimes, I have resentment about being in this program. I say the Serenity Prayer daily, follow a food plan, and try to give myself ten minutes each day to pray or meditate. I go to a strength and flexibility class three times a week and walk three to five times weekly. I read the literature, listen to podcasts, go to … Read More
Crossing That Bridge I certainly was selfish. I wasn’t present to do things with my friends and family, preferring instead to isolate with my best “frenemy”: food. I spent my whole life refusing to accept I was powerless to control my compulsion to overeat, and I’d eat anything I could get my hands on—a lot. I was able to lose lots of weight, … Read More
Twelve Pointers My understanding is that a spiritual awakening is a radical internal rearrangement of attitudes, priorities, desires, and beliefs. The effect is I’ve now become able to do, think, feel, and say things that I could not before— no matter how hard I tried, how sincerely I wanted to, or how dire any consequences. I came into OA in my early … Read More
