Trust Works

Step Two says we “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” There is also a line in AA’s Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions that says, “Take it easy. The hoop you have to jump through is a lot wider than you think” (p. 26).

To me, this describes the leap of faith of replacing myself and my self-will with something else greater than myself. Rather than having a defined idea of what my Higher Power is or looks like, the key to the lock is simply this: to accept that I am not my Higher Power—and to be open to the idea that something else is. To put my faith and trust in something else I have no control over is the key. Since Step Two is not prescriptive, I can make this decision any time. I don’t need to know anything more than “I can’t, so perhaps something else can.”

My experience of taking that leap with my food plan meant accepting that I was incapable of consistency when it came to knowing what, when, and how to eat (or not eat). Therefore, I needed something else in place to provide a structure I could follow, a structure over which I would have no control.

Recently I met two women who had something I wanted, which was sustained and clear abstinence with food.  I started by using one of their food plans because, if it worked for her, it could possibly work for me! It turned out to be based on a plan from the OA Dignity of Choice pamphlet. But it didn’t really matter where the plan came from—not being in control got me clean. In addition, once I experienced that plan and found it to be sustainable, I could see that trust was working for me, so the hoop widened further to cover other areas of my life. Maybe, I thought, I could trust my Higher Power with other stuff too.

My faith continues to deepen with each day of amazing and blessed abstinence. I am celebrating twenty-eight days abstinent, one day at a time.

— Sarah S., United Kingdom