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Thanking My Lucky Stars

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In the past, whenever I got into a rut, had problems, felt angry, or couldn’t cope with stress, I would eat and eat and eat. Eating used to help, especially that first bite. But after that first bite, I would just automatically shove food into my mouth, and I wouldn’t stop until my jaws were tired. I was always hoping that I would soon feel better. Unfortunately, whatever relief I got was only temporary. In the long run, this binge eating never helped because as soon as I finished stuffing my face, I would feel awful! And my original dilemma would still be there, so then I had two problems. Next, I would fall into a depressed state, figuring I was doomed to fail and would remain a fat slob for the rest of my life.

Recently, I went to a potluck party, and after hearing very disturbing news, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I simply plummeted down to a bottom level where I hadn’t been for a long time. I felt as if I had fallen under the floor and underground. In an effort to survive, my mind automatically, frantically tried to get help. I closed my eyes, calmed my breathing, opened my mind, and slowly said the Serenity Prayer three times. My Higher Power was there, and for that, I thank my lucky stars.

I prayed that I would be able to get through the potluck party without screaming and rummaging through the food table, grabbing everything in sight. I was able to calm myself enough to get through the rest of the evening and eat a reasonable amount of food.

I could never have lasted and not gorged myself if it hadn’t been for the Overeaters Anonymous program. What I’ve learned has not only helped me with food but has also helped me get my life together with relationships, finances, emotional upheavals—you name it. This program has literally saved me, and I thank my lucky stars.

Since I’ve been in Overeaters Anonymous for over a year, I’ve learned to go to my Higher Power to get help. I also attend meetings, read literature, see my sponsor, meditate, and try to follow an attainable food plan. I was able to achieve abstinence readily and have only broken it once in over a year. Breaking my abstinence caused major thoughts of sugar for over two weeks, but with the help of the many Tools, I was able to go back to my abstinence. For that alone, I thank my lucky stars.

I start out the day with a certain routine: I pray to my Higher Power, meditate, and plan my day. Next, I walk my dogs, eat breakfast, and read literature. Then, it’s off to the rest of the day, and it’s only 8 a.m.! I feel good and in control, and my dogs feel good too. When I follow this routine, thoughts about what I’ve read seem to be with me the whole day. Even things said at a meeting come to mind, as I can remember and almost hear what people said that related to me.

Without this program, I would not be the person I am today, and I thank my lucky stars I walked into an Overeaters Anonymous meeting almost two years ago.

— Dusty, Chandler, Arizona USA

 

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