Lessons Learned

I just celebrated my sixth OA birthday and took time to reflect upon what I have learned. I am sending this to Lifeline per my sponsor’s direction.

My recovery has taught me:

• I am a woman in recovery. I am no longer a victim.
• There are no mistakes. Everyone I meet is here to show me something if I am willing to look.
• Everything that happened was supposed to happen (because it did).
• Recovery is something I have to work at every day.
• Meditation can turn a mountain back into a molehill.
• Abstinence is my greatest gift, and I never take it for granted.
• The only thing I’ve ever done perfectly is never leaving OA.
• God will continue to send me opportunities to deal with a character defect until I learn the lesson. So, I can just learn it already.
• I haven’t had a “bottom”—yet.
• Wishes are for children.
• Either God is everything or God is nothing.
• I’m either in fear or I’m in faith. I can’t be in both.
• Resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
• A sponsor’s strong suggestion means “do it or else.”
• My sponsor is usually right, so I can stop fighting and save some time.
• The ego has to be smashed.
• If I have a problem with you, I really have a problem with me.
• Everybody is a reflection.
• People can change, but never because I want them to.
• It’s not easy to look at myself, but that’s where the recovery is.
• My thoughts control my feelings; my feelings control my behavior; and I control nothing.
• My family doesn’t have to be just biological.
• I’m unique and I’m not unique.
• Acceptance and gratitude are the keys to my recovery.
• I search for contentment now, not happiness.
• Things don’t happen to me; they happen for me.
• Sometimes unconditional love comes wrapped in a bundle of fur with a tail.
• It is possible to love and to feel my heart expand.
• Don’t leave before the miracle happens. (The miracle isn’t weight loss.)
• Weight loss is the least of the gifts of this program.
• The Ninth Step Promises are real and they come true.
• Vulnerability and humility are necessary to move forward in recovery.
• When something good happens to someone else, I no longer feel it takes something away from me.
• Recovery comes from working with others.
• Gratitude is everywhere if only I’m willing to see it.

My sponsor is a gift of love. She has taught me how a woman in recovery acts. She works a strong program and expects the same of me. She challenges me to question my thoughts daily. She’s kind, but tough, and she won’t compromise my recovery for my feelings. She took my fifteen-hour Fifth Step and then made me a cup of tea. She has shown me how to love and be loved.

I am truly blessed to say she is my family. She asks me if l want relief or recovery, and today I choose recovery.

— Anonymous