First Meeting Back

The seed of OA was planted in this compulsive person’s head in 2002 when I was 19 years old, but I was not yet ready to accept the fact that I was a compulsive overeater. Fast-forward to 2015: at 31 years old, I was at the end of my rope—I’d lost my will to fight for myself and was questioning why I wanted to live. I remembered those wonderful, welcoming people at my first OA meeting and decided to give OA a try again (after all, nothing ventured, nothing gained). I decided I could wait until after the meeting to kill myself if they couldn’t help me. Instead, my experience at that first meeting back saved my life.

The meeting was held at a church not even two minutes down the street from where I’d grown up. I was amazed: how many times had I, while blindly struggling through my life, walked past that church not knowing that just inside was a group of people who spoke my language and met week after week, year after year?

I knew I was home. I took the first part of Step One: I admitted I was truly powerless over food and my life. This honest admission of powerlessness helped me reconnect with a Power greater than myself who would, over time, repair the pieces of my broken heart.

I was greeted with such warmth and love that I felt cherished—like a longtime, forgotten friend returning from a long vacation. That feeling remains with me today, almost four years later. Those people were complete strangers, but they got me to share my feelings and to agree to call them on the phone. Normally, these things would have made me uncomfortable, but everyone in OA understood my crazy, fogged brain. One fellow even offered to call me the next day, which she did, just to see how I was doing.

Collectively, this OA group got me started using the Tools of Recovery that very first day. Over time, this led to a willingness to examine our Steps and Traditions for more guidance and growth. The next week, they asked me to be the meeting facilitator. I did not yet feel comfortable, but about a month into program, I found the confidence I needed to volunteer.

At that first meeting, I learned I have an incurable disease and was able to identify it, although full acceptance came two and half years later. I also learned how important the Steps are to recovery, and I started down the road of spiritual enlightenment about two and a half years into program. I learned there are people out there who care about me, who will teach me things if I trust them. I had found a sponsor at six months in, and she taught me to use our Tools to the best of my ability and to trust myself and my Higher Power, who I call God. She’s been helping me write through the Steps to this day.

I belong in OA today because I have no other place to go. I’ve tried other plans, programs, and diets to help me lose weight, with no success. What these plans, programs, and diets lack is treatment for my physical, emotional, and spiritual sickness. Once I realized that this disease poisons my head and heart as well as my body, I was able to begin the recovery process.

I no longer feel alone or scared of this disease. Oftentimes, I’m even thankful for it because it brought me through the doors of OA. I am still a work in progress, and I realize I will never be cured of this obsession; I must take just one day at a time. I’m okay with that. Today I trust my Higher Power for guidance, and I love my life on life’s terms. Life can be beautiful if I allow it to be.

— Sheryll G., Weymouth, Massachusetts USA